I had been suspicious about my husband’s behavior for quite a while. He started hiding his phone, Returning late from work, Bing too involved with his phone, reduced interaction with me, etc. I tried discussing with him however he simply replied “ I am busy with work.” When I investigated the situation a little further by consulting his friends and coworkers I understood that he was getting closer to another woman subordinate in his office. When I confronted him , he confessed that he was in love with that woman who is much younger. I am 41 and he is 46. We have two children and I do not see divorce or separation as an easy way out of the problem. The woman he is seeing is in her early 20s and no doubt much beautiful. I totally understand his reason for cheating out of the midlife crisis. However, this situation is very difficult for me. I do not have an alternate source of income and am highly dependent upon him. Starting a career at this age isn’t as practical an idea as it seems. I feel really horrible for trusting this man, however, I have no choice but to stay with him for the sake of my children and the fact that I do not have an alternative. My family might support me , however, they wouldn’t be ready to take my responsibility. I have reasons to believe that I am not the only woman suffering from this problem. If anyone else is in the same situation, please let me know how you tackled it. Additional information is that my husband said that he wanted an open relationship. His plan is to continue his relationship with his woman subordinate while staying in the marriage with me, however, he is both physically and emotionally unavailable. It is too late for me to start dating again, and unlike men in their 40s who are pursued for their wealth, women do not get the same opportunities unless it is for something merely physical. With time I have gained weight add my only hope was my husband which does not seem there anymore. How shall I proceed?
My husband is in love with another woman but wants to stay with me
Dear anonymous,
I totally understand your situation and that is why I trust no one. Your husband’s pursuit of other women is his choice. However, as much as he has the right to pursue other women, you need to understand that you are in a vulnerable position because of him. In this case, it is very important that you should start collecting evidence of adultery. Such evidence may not seem necessary to you right now , however, if you wish to leave this relationship it would be very important for you do be financially strong and stable since you already have children.
The choice is surely your if you wish to consult a lawyer or talk it out with your husband . Obviously you know your husband better but then again a man who lies cannot be trusted enough. If I was you I would not take hard decisions. The primary reason for not being so impulsive with decisions is that you need him financially and so do your kids.
So, it would be a wise idea two gather proof yet continue with your marriage till you have a job in hand , your health is better, your kids are settled, you find a better man to support you. Since he has already cheated on you, if you pursue other men, it will not be counted as cheating , so go ahead girl.